The Amyra Records

Every now and then, I am reminded of the richness and depth that is found in the human spirit.  In the materialistic world in which we live, we tend to relate to one another on a superficial level, and the human spirit is often concealed from our perception.  Since the materialistic world thrives on power struggles, our motivation has been lowered to “how do I get more?”.  In our drive to rise above others as the biggest, strongest, richest, best, we dampen the spirits of those with whom we interact. 

In such a world where we’re often caught in a web of low-level struggles - petty fights, judgements, jealousy, control, one-upmanship, greed, grandiosity - the beauty of the human spirit is hidden from us most of the time.  We simply do not see the spirit behind a person, we see only the person’s physical appearance and persona.  Consequently, we lose respect for humanity as we see our fellow human beings either as flawed or as candidates for competition. 

Occasionally, we’re able to sense something greater in a person other than their body and persona.  The pursuit of a dream, the courageous healing of long-held pain, an altruistic act, a great surrender, a creative expression, an uninhibited expression of joy and freedom …. they reveal the greater truth about the spirit of humanity. 

The spirit of humanity is capable of a great many things.  Yet we’ve been conditioned to express ourselves as small, weak, ugly and powerless beings - devoid of the spirit that gives us depth in our existence.  We act as if our spirits do not exist.  Our spirit has an intelligence that surpasses logic - one that includes but not limited to our deductive reasoning.  When we express ourselves from the level of our spirit, unfettered by our self-made fears, we tap into a vast potential within ourselves.  We begin to show ourselves and others that who we thought we were is just the tip of the iceberg, or not even real. 

The way into our spirit is through our emotional self.  We feel it first as a stirring in our emotional self.  That emotional connection is a bridge to our spiritual self.  For a lot of people, however, their emotional self has been hardened from a long time of keeping unprocessed pain, and their sensitivity is deadened against any spiritually-moving experiences.  As such, they cannot be touched nor inspired by the spirit of humanity.  In protecting their pain, they remain bitter, hard, critical and controlling - they miss out on seeing humans in their full potential and the world seems unfair to them.  The great spirit of humanity is lost to them. 

I often see or hear of people who’ve gone through an emotional healing to experience a spiritual opening.  As the heart heals, the door to our spirit opens.  We experience ourselves, or others, as more than just flesh and mind.  As we experience ourselves as spirits, we automatically open up to a world where so much more is in store for us. 

In ending, I would like to share this poem written by a friend.  She shared it as a song, sung to a beautiful tune she’d composed on her guitar.  Listening to her had inspired this post. 

Her name was Mary
Her dreams took her soul and it travelled the world
She saw veins, lies, truths
Everything conceivable, existable,
She saw the rings on every bark
She saw the specks of sand on their feet
She soared
The millions of galaxies, stars, suns,
She looked over herself, this being exists
She saw heaven before this body died
“I’m finally free”
She saw her lover weeping by her side
Waiting for her to come back - mind and soul
love over freedom
She thought about this flesh - this gift, this life
It’s time, she thought
It’s time to live this dream

Recently, I’ve been getting strong visions of an eland.  I am brought back to the first time I saw one in Kenya last December.  While driving around a friend’s plot of land, I noticed an eland from afar, and was strangely touched by the way it seemed to be looking straight at me.  Although it stood too far for me to see, I felt the strange power in its eyes - sweet, gentle, kind but imbued with a grounded strength and the wisdom of an old soul. 

Something in that encounter captured my soul, as if the magnificent and almost mythological creature had something to communicate to me.  Yet it had remained unexplored until now when I’m called to listen intently to it.  In my dreams, it shows itself - an elegant, self-assured being with words of wisdom to impart.  Its eyes speak volumes and depths, such that no verbal sounds are necessary.  In my waking moments, I see the eland in my mind, again looking straight at me. 

The eland seems to have a humorous take on life.  Its face looks as if it’s about to break into a smile, as if it’s saying, “Why do you take life so seriously?”  I think this is what gives the eland such a clear energy - the ability to detach from the harshness of life and see the greater connectedness in everything.  This gives me a warm feeling and makes me trust the eland for what it has to relay to me.     

In getting closer to the eland spirit, I’ve felt its strange powers.  In my vision, it presented me with a gift in the form of a golden egg which it regurgitated after ingesting a rock of clear crystal picked from the roof of a natural tunnel.  Upon receiving the gift, I felt a huge healing in my heart and felt connected to the souls of the people whom the eland looks after and guides.  My sense of abandonment was soothed with the realisation that the spirits take on the work to care for those who are connected to them - that our work to care for another is shared and supported by the natural kingdom. 

Someone once told me that the eland has a unique sweet smell.  In one of my visions, I entered the body of the eland and buried myself among its flesh.  I could feel the warmth of its living flesh pressed on every surface of my body.  Suddenly, I became over-powered by a sweet aroma which entered my senses of smell as well as taste.  I realised that the power of the eland is transferred (at least partially) through the sweet scent it emits. What an other-worldly sensation to embody the eland.      

I took a shot of the eland in Kenya but had lost my camera during the trip.  I woke up this morning from a strong dream about the eland and felt guided to post about it.  When I thought about posting a picture along with it, I went straight to my computer and found the photo.  Rather mysterious as I’ve been using a new computer for only several weeks.  Check out the power of the eland below. 

I have just come to an end of a relationship and it’s been a test of my own connectivity to come out of it healed.  I’m reminded of how stresses can trigger old, destructive tendencies and in times of great stress it’s imperative that we watch ourselves vigilantly so that we don’t slide back to a well-trodden but useless path. 

Time seems to slow down when we’re in deep emotional pain.  Not in a pleasant way, but in a way that seems to just drag on and prolong our pain.  I’m reminding myself that this is a good thing - there are simply too many easily-available ways for us to numb our pain, and the temptation to bury pain is the evil which all addictive persons must fight.  Pain can only be healed if pain was present in our awareness.

The sense of time slowing down allows us to reflect on our behaviours and the choices we’ve made thus far in life, as any transitional period in our lives is a crossroad where lots of potential growth can take place.  The wholesome approach to dealing with pain is to allow the pain to heal and to look towards uncovering the gift beneath it, however hopeless it may seem to be right now.  

This may seem like an impossible task, to stay calm and balanced enough to see anything other than madness, when we’re experiencing a great loss.  I’m sitting in that dark hole and telling you that it is not all bleak.  In the apparent bleakness, I can see specks of light which I can focus on until they grow, expand and dominate the shade of my outlook now.  But I’m afraid.  I’m afraid of light.  So I choose to stay in darkness. 

This is an interesting revelation which perhaps many can relate to.  If we had a choice of staying in the dark or moving out into the light, what would be our likely choice?  Rationally, we would choose to move into the light, but our first instinct is likely to stay in the dark.  It is far easier to stay in pain, darkness, imprisonment and fear than to embrace light, freedom, goodness and delight.  What that means is, sometimes, making the choices that are good for us takes effort. 

Sometimes, the dazzle of light is too much to take in when we’ve been in intense darkness, making us cautious about opening the doors to reveal more light into our existence.  But like our eyes taking time to adjust to sudden bright light, the discomfort is temporary.  Just as we would open our eyes fully eventually, so too can we open the doors to light shining into our lives fully if we knew that the transition from darkness to brightness yields only temporary discomfort. 

I am choosing light.  I stay put, not retreating from the promise of light.  I inch forward, prying open a few doors just slightly to let in a comfortable amount of light.  I see my whole being as the proverbial eye, adjusting to the goodness of life bit by bit from my dark imprisonment of pain.  I discover that where the light hits my pain, I cringe in fear, but then that pain heals, freeing me one bit more.  One day soon, I will find that the eye of my entire being opens fully against the light - and I am again filled with laughter, creativity, inspiration.