Addiction For Human Drama: Are You Addicted to Stress, Anxiety and Dramas?

24 Aug
August 24, 2011

Are You Addicted to Dramas? - Unusual Wisdom

A common scenario when I’m working with a client – whether they are dealing with addictions, eating disorder, weight issues or relationship problems – is listening to how their life has gotten out-of-control and the resulting stress and anxiety they battle with.  They want to get rid of these uncomfortable symptoms, and I understand that.  But sometimes, I notice that the client does not actually want to give up their dramas.  “I just want to have a peaceful life,” they say with a  heavy sigh.  Yet I may sense in them an attachment to living a highly-strung, chaotic life. ...keep reading

Superwoman Under Stress: How to Overcome Over-Responsibility and Guilt

18 Aug
August 18, 2011

Superwoman Under Stress: How to Overcome Over-Responsibility and Guilt
I’ve encountered, through my work, many professionally successful women who struggle with immensely stressful lives.  It seems that they are pulled in so many directions that they’re breaking under the strain of their responsibilities.  They feel trapped in a life of unhappiness where every day is just about making it through the day with what little’s left of their energy reserve.  Having a successful career seems to come at a price, and this is especially true if you’re a woman. ...keep reading

Lying In The Bed You Made

24 Apr
April 24, 2011

The other day, someone was telling me about an undesirable situation he was in and I asked him why he was choosing to remain in it.  He said he has made his bed and now he has to lie in it.  This brings to mind something that I often come across when looking at the complexities about being in a state of suffering: how we can trap ourselves in suffering by doing nothing to reconcile the conflicts that give rise to the suffering.

We might try to change things superficially within the situation, hoping it will bring improvement, but that may not be enough or effective.  And if what you’re doing to try to change or improve things brings no real and lasting results, you may end up feeling frustrated with yourself and make your suffering even more immediate to you. ...keep reading

Become Your Ultimate Self

29 Nov
November 29, 2010

Become Your Ultimate Self with Amyra Mah, Unusual Wisdom
I was really inspired by a friend who told me that his goal is to be ‘Ultimate’. I did not ask him to define what it means, as I immediately felt the uplifting energy and understood what it meant for me. Being Ultimate for me means living my life as joyously as I possibly can. It includes being the best that I can be, without compromising myself and my values, and actualising my highest potential in my human experience.

Having this kind of personal vision can be very empowering and can inspire you to show yourself just how great your potential as a human being is – to do, feel, create, express, heal, change and expand. There is no universal “best”. My best can look very different from your best. But to be your best regardless of what it looks like so that you live your life being your Ultimate Self, there are four things that you can do. ...keep reading

The Twisted Side Of Things

29 Nov
November 29, 2010

 The Evil Doctor Heiter Cartoon Illustration
About two months ago, I was sitting in a therapy group facilitated by my co-workers. The group explored the theme of self-image and in an exercise clients were asked to write down a list of their strongest attributes. I decided to join in and write my list. One of my co-workers chuckled when he saw my list – in particular at the word ‘twisted’ which I had included as one of my attributes. He and another co-worker, both often subjected to my twisted taste in entertainment and sense of humour, concurred that twisted I am indeed. The clients, who became intrigued by this seemingly dark attribute which I’d so openly declared as an aspect of me, wanted to know more. My colleagues wanted me to explain myself, to reveal the deeper layers of my psyche…. ...keep reading

Why We Stay In Abusive Situations

30 Sep
September 30, 2010

Picturesque View of Wildlife in Kenya
When working with clients, I see a common theme that crops up all the time, no matter what life issues they are struggling with at the time.  It is the feeling of being trapped, unable to find a way out of a situation.  Whether it is in a relationship, a job situation, or their home life, there is a huge emotional need to create change but also a daunting prospect of what taking steps towards change could entail.  These problems manifest as stresses, confusions, frustrations, worries and conflicts.  The word ‘stuck’ is very apt in these situations, as they struggle internally with wanting things to be different and yet are crippled by thoughts of negative consequences of change. ...keep reading

Unleashing Creativity Without Using Drugs

16 Jun
June 16, 2010

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA
There is a belief among many whose profession lies in churning out creative works that drugs enable them to tap into their creative well, that without drugs they could never produce the works that have earned them their professional recognition.  Writers, musicians, artists whose lifestyles involve indulging in too much drugs and alcohol usually find it a huge struggle to give up the substance they’ve become addicted to when they embark on stopping their subtance abuse.  This is the main challenge for every ‘creative type’ individual I have worked with in addiction. ...keep reading

“Accept The Unacceptable”

12 Apr
April 12, 2010

Accept the Unacceptable - Amyra Mah, Unusual Wisdom
I was watching an animated movie about Doctor Strange, the Marvel Comics creation.  It was my first introduction to the character and I was fascinated by the world of sorcery portrayed in the story.  The movie depicts how Dr Stephen Strange, a successful surgeon, who after injuring his hands in an accident finds his way to a monastery in Tibet where he is trained by The Ancient One to be a powerful sorcerer.  Lots of spiritual lessons reflected in the movie, especially in the doctor’s early training when he has to move past the pain of his loss, guilt and shame to recover a sense of purpose in his life. ...keep reading

Why People Are Driven To Destroy Themselves

18 Mar
March 18, 2010

Trees with Purple Flowers, Kanchanaburi, Thailand
One of the themes that often come up when dealing with addictions is the tendency for self-destruction – when the drive to use drugs, alcohol or other compulsive activities renders a person unable to stop that behaviour but to spiral faster and faster into destroying himself.  Why do some people seem to have this need to destroy themselves?  What can they do to break out of this obsessive drive that seems to grip them so powerfully?

Whether a person is dealing with an obsession with drugs, alcohol, money, sex or food, the nature of this obsession is the same.  The greed for more (in quantity, frequency and intensity) escalates as the person breaks down more and more boundaries that have previously defined what kept him safe.  These boundaries may relate to the physical body (what is and isn’t acceptable for what we do to our body), social circle (who is and isn’t appropriate for us to hang out with), our moral codes (what behaviours we will and won’t accept from ourselves), and our dignity (what we will and won’t tolerate from others).  Deep in the throes of addiction, gripped by obsession, we cross that line again and again, pushing our boundaries further and further away from us. ...keep reading

Simplicity Is The Way To Go

25 Jan
January 25, 2010

View Walking Down from Glastonbury Tor
I’ve been asked what my resolution is for 2010, so I will share it here.  For the record, I have stopped making new year resolutions some years ago.  I had found that the long list I tended to come up with too depressing after a while.  Too much unnecessary pressure, as if life did not present enough on my plate already!  I’ve since taken the route of flowing with whatever life presents, whatever time of the year it is.  This year, if I were to come up with one resolution, it would be to keep every area of my life as simple as possible. ...keep reading