• Lying In The Bed You Made

    Bed in Hotel in Koh Chang, Thailand

    The other day, someone was telling me about an undesirable situation he was in and I asked him why he was choosing to remain in it.  He said he has made his bed and now he has to lie in it.  This brings to mind something that I often come across when looking at the complexities about being in a state of suffering: how we can trap ourselves in suffering by doing nothing to reconcile the conflicts that give rise to the suffering.

    We might try to change things superficially within the situation, hoping it will bring improvement, but … Keep reading

  • Changing Your State Is A Matter of Choice

    The other day I was co-facilitating a group and found myself feeling tired.  My tendency, when tired, is to float along with whatever I am doing, resigned to the fact that my energy is low and that there’s nothing to be done until it is over and I can get to a private place to recharge myself.  What that means is that my attention in the interim would be diffused.  This time, however, knowing that it was important for me to stay focused and alert, I took steps to change my state right there and then.  Within a few minutes, … Keep reading

  • Finding The Gift In An Illness

    Yesterday, I met up with a friend whom I hadn’t seen for almost three years.  She seemed so different from when I last saw her – her energy is expansive and bright, and she has an aura of peace about her.  The transformation from the last time I’d seen her was stark.  Her depression, the heavy sadness and pain which hung about her three years ago is gone, replaced by a certain presence and relaxed self-assuredness.

    She’s a model of someone who took responsibility to change for the better when confronted by what seemed like bad news.  A year ago, … Keep reading