A friend recently asked me if I ever felt lonely. I thought about it, and realised that it had been a long time since I remembered feeling lonely. This realisation was huge for me. For most of my life I had suffered from a deep sense of loneliness. It’s the kind of loneliness that did not go away just because I had company, but one that stayed perpetually in the background of my psyche like some quietly-growing disease.

Afterwards, I reflected on when my loneliness had left me. It was definitely a very gradual shift over many years of self-healing. But it was really since channeling and practising The Art of Dissolving Unwanted Reality that I have been totally liberated from a deep insecurity which had been the source of my loneliness and other mental-emotional afflictions.

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I recently read a critical review about my book Embrace The Unlovable, by Elizabelth Galen, Ph.D.  As a visionary writer who frequently pushes the envelope to invite new approaches and perspectives to healing and personal growth, I expect to receive criticisms from traditional sectors of these fields as part and parcel of sharing my views with the world.

This particular critical piece, however, presented some important examples of the very limitations of what is available in mainstream treatment that I highlighted in my book. Therefore, I decided it would be an excellent source for me to use as a tool to reinforce some of my key messages – so that we can go beyond the limits of what we’re told is possible in healing from shame and other deep emotional wounds.

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Are you in one of those periods where everything just seems to fall apart?  Where the whole world seems to be against you?  Where anything that can go wrong, is going wrong in one way or another?

I have good news for you:  Contrary to how it may seem and how it’s making you feel, you are in an immensely powerful place.  If you know how powerful this is, you can take advantage of the gifts it contains.  But if you see it as unfortunate and a series of bad luck – that you’re in a bad phase of your life – then you are not only prolonging your hardship, you may never gain the potential benefits it can yield.

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Are you in one of those phases when you’ve been waiting for some changes but nothing seems to be happening?  As far as you know, you’ve done all the right things, according to what you know about the laws of manifestation.  You feel you’ve done everything that you’ve been taught – you’ve trusted, surrendered, taken inspired actions, etc. – yet nothing is showing up.

You’ve even tried doing nothing.  You’ve tried sitting in the void, but the void can be a bitch when all you get is pain or emptiness.  What else is there to do?

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Here’s a scenario I often see:

You have a creative project that you’ve been ‘sitting on’.  The project may be writing a book, creating a business out of a cool idea, travelling to a place that particularly draws you, going back to school to study something you love, or learning a creative art form.  You love the idea of the lifestyle you imagine you’re able to have once you have embarked on this project.  But you think you need to achieve certain financial goals before you can afford to do it.  Years go by while you tell yourself that you need to wait until you have more money, saved enough money, win the lottery… and instead of moving closer to actualisation, the project increasingly becomes a mere fantasy.

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Nobody likes crises.  Yet most who have survived one would be able to tell you that they gained something valuable from the experience and how it’s made them better persons.  I believe that crises often happen to help steer us back on the path that is aligned with our soul:

Sometimes, it happens after we’ve failed to see and follow repeated signals that our soul had been giving us; when anything short of a crisis would not get our attention.

Other times, it happens because the crisis is deemed to be the best way for us to learn specific lessons.

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“The most powerful way to shape our lives is to get ourselves to take action,” says self-help guru Anthony Robbins.

I like Tony and admire his work; as far as motivational teachers go, few can stoke my inner fire for motivation, and get me going and taking actions quite like him.  But whilst I appreciate the power of taking actions to move towards what we want in life, I disagree that it is the most powerful way to shape our lives.

There’s a whole lot more involved that needs to be taken into consideration than just making yourself take actions.  Yes, taking action is important but his statement requires some caveats.

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I’ve been noticing at this time that those of us who are on the path of conscious evolution are being nudged to the next level of awakening to our true selves.  As a therapist and soul worker, I feel called to assist in lifting the collective veil so that we live more authentic lives.  For me, it means continuing to challenge conventional wisdom, to find new pathways towards our evolution.

One thing I have noticed increasingly is that many people who regularly consume self-help and spiritual healing products remain stuck in unhappiness.  Chasing after the next new book, course, seminar, healing modality has become an addiction in our quest to liberate ourselves from continued suffering.  Yet, as the high of the promise and hope of the product leaves you, you find yourself back to where you’d started:

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I was listening to Srinivas Rao’s The Unmistakable Creative podcast where he interviewed Allison Gryphon, who upon being diagnosed with cancer channeled her energy into something she calls “fearless filmaking” – both as a coping mechanism and an inspired project.  She described the moments just after she had learnt the news, where she experienced life being fully present for the first time: walking on the beach she felt sand like she never felt sand before; eating strawberries and drinking expresso, and truly tasting them for the first time.  She reminisced about how wonderful it would be if that is the place people start off with, rather than wait until we are faced with death to start being truly alive.

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